The Importance of Being Lauren

Oh my goodness!!!!!! A couple minutes ago at dinner I had this terrible experience that I hope will never be subjected to ever again!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You see I was just absentmindedly enjoying my ravioli at dinner, and my mom who had already finished hers was going through the grocery bags and exclaimed,"Papi, I see that you've bought this lovely loofah for yourself. What's that all about?" My dad got defensive about his new ugly loofah and said,"Well I was tired of using that puny white spongy so I had to get this ." Suddenly I heard in a faint voice the description of "puny white spongy". "Wait a minute........" I thought to myself; that sounds just like my spongy, the one that I bought for camp...............(all of this thinking only took a second) And then............ "Noooooooooooo!!!!!!! Oh my gosh!!!!!! Oh my gosh!!!!!!! Oh my gosh!!!!!!! That's my spongy!!!!!!!! Oh my gosh!!!!!!! You scrubbed your nasty butt with the spo...

Last week while my familia and I raided our local Kroger store we met this rude lovely lady on the reject aisle . I personally think the lovely lady was badly in need of a couple of glasses of apple juice, and a couple of reeealllly long naps!!!!!! My feisty middle sister Caterpillar is notoriously known for her temper-tantrums, and her "stubborn as a mule" attitude. At one store all the employees know her by name and they shake their heads and mumble,"It's Caterpillar! The girl with the baddest attitude in all of Tacoville!!!!!" every time we come in. (Just like in Hello Dolly where the waiters all start whispering,"It's Dolly! It's Dolly! The lady with the biggest appetite in all of New York City!!!") Anyway the most recent tantrum was over her doctors appointment, she was so upset that she yelled at my mom,"I'm not going home with you! I'm going to live here forever!!!" She even sat down in the middle of the aisle t...

I was sitting on my moms bed talking, and waiting for the accursed Parental Blocks to allow me back on the computer when this happened........ Me: Buster, pretty please may I read your Boy Scout popcorn brochure! You know how much I love reading it!! Buster: No. It's mine. Me: But.......But for all these years I've let you read my American Girl magazines!! Buster: *gasp* What? *frantic jerking of his head* Mom, I have no idea what she is talking about! Me: *evil grin* Yet you do Buster....Don't you remember when you got in that cat-fight with Warden Monkey for the last issue? I mean with all the injuries you sustained from that, I thought that you might remember. Buster: *Incomprehensible murmuring and dirty looks* Me: Can I read your brochure now ?...... *The sad thing about all of this is that I didn't even get to read the brochure, even after all of that!! Oh, well....*

Friday afternoon my mom finally decided to satisfy her ongoing craving for Chinese food. As soon as we walked through those golden doors; and passed that smiling Buddha rubbing his own belly, I knew that it was going to be an odd meal. I was the source of entertainment in the beginning of the meal, because every time I ate a piece of sushi I would pile on the wasabi and pop it in my mouth. If you have ever had wasabi you will know what happened, for those of you that haven't it isn't pleasant at all! As the meal progressed I ate even more sushi and then I almost tried egg drop soup. I say almost because I got scared of the absolutely horrid smell. When we were all so full that we could hardly move; my mom bet Buster everything in her wallet to eat a octopus. While Buster went up to get it, I whined to my dad that nobody ever bets me to eat stuff he told me,"Well Sunbum it's because you'd eat anything . So it's not any fun to do it to you." Hm.. It's ...

One day as our dad cooked dinner and my sisters and I were setting the table we decided that like Snow White's annoying 'whistle while you work' admonition we also needed something to do while we worked. Suddenly without a word of warning all us girls suddenly burst out singing ' Clothes Off' by Gym Class Heroes. Dad was horrified! As we all shoulder shook, and sang into our forks he just shook his head at our craziness and went back to cooking.... I would like to see Snow White and her animal posse do that. "We don't have to take our clothes off to have a good time, oh no......"

It's my birthday!!!!! Yes, I'm turning 13 today. *sob* So far I have been treated to a dewberry pancake breakfast courtesy of Monkey, my other siblings decorated my chair, and ladder with streamers. They look really awesome! Plus Mel even let me have pink Boobah to carry around for the rest of the day. Then they made really cute flowers out of tissue paper, one of the flowers is behind my ear at the moment. I love my brothers, and sisters! *Ha! I'm not going to be thirteen until 12:45!*

In my house I'm considered the Roach slayer , so whenever there's a roach terrorizing the not-so-innocent residence in our house no matter what time it is, I have to go kill it. There have been a lot of tree roaches around here lately so I have been in a constant Code Raid alert made for a while. Anyhow yesterday morning my mom woke me up at 4:00 to kill a roach that she had seen crawling in between the orange bag, and plates that Caterpillar had neglected to put away the night before. I wanted to get over with it as soon as possible, so I walked into the kitchen not knowing what kind of trouble I was getting into. As soon as I saw how huge that thing was I instantly felt afraid, and wanted to turn back and run to my bed. Curse that stupid brain of mine that decided to stay and face that absolutely ginormous roach ! *shudder* I'm still scared to think about it. Okay back to the story... Monkey was awakened by mom also but she's never much help when it comes ...

Today is Monkeys 12th birthday. Yes, we are both going to be 12 for the next month. Isn't that great? So this is for you Monkey. Sorry I just discovered that there is very few pictures of just you alone. Well Happy Birthday anyway!!!! Come here to wish her a happy birthday too! She's the tallest person in this picture. *sniff* This is what she had to wear when doing Taekwondo. It was completely white until she started exercising in it. Woo hoo! That was one of the funnest pictures ever to take. Wasn't it? (Is funnest a word?) I think she might love this family more than me. :( She is a true cheese-ball, but we all love her like that. These are her stick-figures, man they're very fancy! Beware: She is fierce when she has her cookie gun. Make no sudden movements when she has it in her hands. You have been warned. Seriously she gets really mean if you mess up the cookies. These are some of the things I know about you: Your favorite color is: Turquoise Your fav...